Sometimes I wish you were two people, so I'd still have that one person that I can tell everything to.
Because sometimes I want to talk to you about you, about how you make me so upset sometimes..
I don't even know if this makes sense. I just have no one to really talk to, because no one understands better than you. And I hate that.
I don't have any real girlfriends to talk to because I have just become so attached and dependent on only you. And no one else really seems that important to me. And I really don't think you get that..

I didn't even ever think it was possible for me to come to this.
I want myself back. I want to just be me, and just have me and not have to worry about other peoples feelings by making my own decisions.
I want certain people back, but that's too selfish of me right?
I keep telling myself to just have fun. But no one will let me.

I don't want to feel like this, I constantly feel as if I did something wrong, when I know I didn't.
But my head hurts, my body aches, my heart feels like it's close to breaking even though I know this will blow over, it wasn't anything big, it wasn't anything real..but maybe it is the beginning of something real. Which I hate to think about. I don't know what I would do without my bestfriend and my love.
I beg for forgiveness just so I can see you smile because of me instead of glare and remain silent.
How pathetic is love?

I'd break my heart for you.

Oh Bon

There was just so much screaming.
Yells and Cries.
Our faces were red and distorted. Both of our eyes filled.
And then it stopped.
Silence, with a few sniffles thrown in.
We went from screaming to kissing.
In an instant.
You tell me that I'm all you've got.
And I suddenly feel the exact same.

it's become exceedingly difficult to hang out with my friends, and sure, a big part is my fault, but what about the rest?
I always complain about them, but never do anything to fix it because I don't think they would care if I tried.
I wish May 30th would hurry up and get here. And bring that special someone with it.

They don't care and neither do I.
I'm negative.
I can only keep friends who long to be kept by me.
Others just fall away by the way side.
That's just how I am.

Up with your turret
Aren't we just terrified?
Shale, screen your worry from what you won't ever find

Don't let it fool you
Don't let it fool you...down
Down's sitting round, folds in the gown

Sea and the rock below
Cocked to the undertow
Bones blood and teeth erode, with every crashing node

Wings wouldn't help you
Wings wouldn't help you...down
Down fills the ground, gravity's proud

You barely are blinking
Wagging your face around
When'd this just become a mortal home?

Won't, won't, won't, won't

Won't let you talk me
Won't let you talk me…down
Will pull it taut, nothing let out


p.s. A big black bird just banged into my window twice..how ironic.
"wings wouldn't help you, wings wouldn't help you...down"

And

A sigh of relief.

I'm numb.

And so extremely, incredibly, horrifyingly apologetic.